So idk awkward blog time where I pour out me heart to no one and everyone. Idk it’s been a Long…..day? Night? Week? Year? Life? I’m so tired I can’t see straight. I don’t have the patience or time to care for anyone but me right now. But is that bad? Shouldn’t I care for myself before others? I just wanna be better. And have energy and be pretty. I feel so gross. I think the only person who loves me my friend loves too. Also my parents hate him. Maybe I’m being too soft on his bad habits and history. Maybe I shouldn’t date a used to be druggie but for now he makes me happy. He may be the only thing anymore. I miss being alive. I feel so angry and empty. I just wanna throw myself out my window. Wear wings and write a note “I wish I could fly” I wish I could. Maybe then I’d be loved. Maybe then Travis would stop drugs and mark would tex back and my parents would let me go to any school. But until then I have I keep jumping. Falling all by myself. Cause when you’re falling.. You’re always alone.